was a fairly good weekend, up until after the show. where i was convinced to go to a 21st of a old school friend of mine... where it just reminded me of how alienated i am from the average person the same age of me. trust, goals, happiness comes so easily to these people... yelling conversations over loud foo fighters, dancing with each other, generally having fun. while i was sitting in the corner trying not to gain attention from them, hoping beyond hope they would not come talk to me, that they would not come and see the desperation for release on my face...
of course then came on the long drive home the wonder "whats wrong with me?" emerged. along with the necessary self loathing and disgust and panic.
it seems ive made my bed, and i really cannot wait to sleep in it. i want to sleep. im giving in but never giving up.
best tattoo artists gloucestershire
4 years ago
1 comment:
sometimes i wish i could be one of these "normal" people, just so i dont feel so lost and fucked up all the time. but i'd rather feel the way i do now, then be happy in a world that i dont believe in.
we're royalty in exile, dude. you arent completely alone in the world.
Post a Comment